[浮躁]翻译批评与赏析
刻画人物:
细节描写包括:人物形象、特征、动作、语言、心理及所处环境和场面等
人物动作
翻译策略,方法及技巧:
归化; 意译;省译 ,增译
(意译,省译)1韩文举醉卧着,看见岸上歪过来的一株柳上,一瓣黄月朦胧,柳枝上的两只斑鸠似睡未睡亦在朦胧。 那双手窸窣而动,咣啷啷在船板上将六枚铜钱一溜儿撒开;火柴划亮。三枚“宝通”朝上。恰火柴又灭了,又划一根,翻开的是一本线装古书,烂得没头没尾;寻一页看了,脑袋放沉,酒气中咕哝一句:“今年又要旱了!”
窸窣( xi su):象声词,形容细小的摩擦声
Han Wenju laydrunk in the bottom of his boat, looking up at the dropping willowbranch and the hazy yellow moon above it. The haze caught two turtledoves perching sleepily on the branch. Han Wenju ’s hand shook as he tossed six copper coins onto the wooden planks, where they clanked around. He struck a match; three lay face up. The match went out. He struck another and picked up an ancient, thread-bound book, He found
the page he was looking for. His brain was clouded , and he gave off the stench of alcohol when he said, “ Another year of drought!”
dog-eared: 卷角的(书),翻烂的(书)
cloud : to show sadness, fear, etc ( 显得阴沉)
(意译)2 脚手架上,爹是一个四脚虫,骑在椽上,双脚交叉,努力着平衡,画笔就吸饱各色颜料,画一笔,在嘴上备备,再画一笔,再备备,嘴唇上便滑稽可笑,吐一口唾沫也五颜六色。
Golden Gog’s father could climb the scaffolds like a , and when he was up on a beam, he wrapped his legaround it, balancing precariously as he took out his brush, dipped it in whatever color he was using, and painted one carefully stroke after another, smoothing the brush in his mouth until his lips looked like a comical rainbow and his spit was a riot of color.
precariously 不稳定地;摇摇晃晃地
四脚虫: spider (a small creature with eight thin legs)
four-legged bug. insect ?
(意译,省译)3. 话是这般说,却舀面调和搓揉,搓揉了四四一十六遍,面“醒”得软软的,筋,却真的没给金狗吃长条子面,一颗一
颗包了一罗底饺子,竟也在一颗饺子里包上一枚硬币。
She took out some dough and kneaded it until it was soft and springy. But instead of making noodles, she rolled out little round skis and made dumplings for him, putting a coin into the center of one.
Knead : to press and stretch dough, wet clay, etc. with your hands to make it ready to use (揉,捏 面团,湿黏土等)
舀: bail out
took out
springy: 有弹性的,松软的
(意译)4. 金狗才蓦地明白浮柴积在水面,厚得冲不开,就将麻袋口的绳子缚在脚上,身子平行,双手奋力向一边划动,终从岩脚的清水里浮出来。
When he realized he’d risen against some wood floating on the surface, which he couldn’He finally in the clear water at the foot of the crag and ...
(意译,省译)5 福运也便不再论什么理,将衣服脱下垫在肩头去扛
了木梁大头,粗声闷气地一阵吆喊,端端正正按到架上,一脸得意…… face: “ ...
人物形象、特征的刻画
:
(Conversion: adj-n )1. ……山大王就是巩宝山,少年英武,气盛而善谋略。 , the latest in a long line of hunters.
bearing 姿态,举止
(意译,Conversion: n-adj ) 2他自小就做孤儿, 相貌丑陋,蛮力超群,长到三十出头还没有婚娶,裤裆破了也没个人补。 still unmarried at the age of thirty, so that there was no one at home to mend the tattered crotch of his trousers.
(意译,省译)3. 一抬头,岸上走来一个女子,轻手软腿的。太阳正照在她的脸上,金狗觉得天上的太阳已不存在,那脸是一盘肉太阳,这太阳有鼻子眼睛的让人亲近。
He looked up and spotted a girl walking gracefully toward them. The sun was shining on her face, and for Golden Dog the real sun ceased to exist, eyes that draw people toward it.
(省译,归化)4. 日光荏苒,小水长高了,长美了,熟得像一颗软了的火晶蛋柿,任何青春少年都视她是菩萨,又觉得她是一只可人的小兽。
She was as ripe as a soft persimmon. To the young men who saw her she was a goddess and, at the same time, a fetching little wild animal.
11 Yingying ’s mother was a middle-aged woman who was sill graceful and refined looking. She was wearing a short jacket with a light floral pattern that day and had a white jade comb in her hair.
fetching :(especially of a person or their clothes 尤指人或穿的衣服)attractive 吸引人的;迷人的;动人的
(意译,增译)2 七八个汉子跳下河去摸。斜对岸的水里就冒出金狗,嬉皮笑脸锐叫:“我在这儿:”
Seven or eight men dived in just as his head popped above the surface near the opposite shore. “ here I am!”
Pop : to suddenly appear, especially when not expected(让人意外的) 突然出现;冷不防地冒出
giggled :to laugh in a silly way because you are amused, embarrassed or nervous (因感到有趣、窘迫或紧张而)咯咯地笑;傻笑