搞笑英语对话

1.简要介绍你自己。 简历上都有，写得很详细。 2.你为什么对这份工作感兴趣？ 说实话，我并不感兴趣，但人不能没有工作，找到一份先干着。

3.谈谈你的优势？

你是说跟其他的应聘者相比吗？我不认识他们。

4.谈谈你最大的弱点是什么？

太老实，领导怎么说我怎么干。

5.为什么你认为自己适合这个职位？

你们招聘广告上只有这么一个职位。

6.你的简历上有些什么值得特别关注的吗？

封面比较漂亮，花了两块多钱做的。

7.你为什么选择这个专业？

瞎选的，当时不知道自己喜欢干什么。

8.你有哪些兴趣爱好呢？

业余时间喜欢当暴露狂。

9.你对于短期和长期的目标是什么？

短期目标是先生存下来，长期的目标还不知道，人生就像巧克力嘛。

10.如果我向你的朋友或者家人询问对你的评价，你认为他们会怎样说？

我觉得你聪明的话应该去问我的仇人，这样得到的答案更有参考价值。

12.你争取成功的动力是什么？ 成功才会有钱，有钱就有了女人 15.你能向我列举一个团队活动和领导力的例子吗？ 我在大学就喜欢赌博，每次打牌都是我组织的。

16.你经历过最大的挑战是什么？你如何跨越它的？

在大学赌博被抓，学校要开除我，后来我给教导主任买了6条“中华”，软包装的。

17.我为什么要从这么多应聘者中选择你呢？

你的问题为什么要我来回答。

18.你有一些什么问题吗？

加班的话有没有便当？

19.你去年的收入是多少？你对于报酬有什么样的期望？

我去年玩了一年，没收入。我对报酬的期望是：尽你们所能给的越多越好。

20.在过去的日子里，你觉得自己最大的成就是什么？

在这个世界上活了二十多年还没死。

21.曾经有人要求你去做一些不道德的事情吗？如果有，你是怎么处理的呢？ 不是每次都去，我有我自己的原则。

22.如果你完全不同意你上司的某个要求，你怎么处理？

同意。

26.你怎样在一堆根本做不完的工作任务中区分轻重缓急？

反正做不完，区分出来又有什么用？

27.为什么下水道的井盖是圆的？

如果是方的你又要问为什么是方的。不管怎样它总得有个形状吧。

30.有哪些因素可能会让你失去动力或信心？

奖金比别人的少。

31.对于你来说，与团队一起工作和独自干活哪样效率更高？ 那要看干什么活了。如果是拔河当然团队比较好，如果是泡mm还是独自效率比较高。 32.积极的态度对你有多重要？ 我不看重态度，我重视的是结果。

33.你怎样定义成功？

认识你的人都羡慕你，这就是成功。

34.你大学阶段最大的遗憾是什么？

钱不是很够花。

35.你曾经做过的最难的决定是什么？

别人约我去做不道德的事，我考虑到底去不去。

36.你理想的工作是什么？

我说了你能帮我实现吗？

38.你离开原来的公司主要原因是什么？

女上司对我进行性骚扰。

39、你到一个新的公司，如果你的下属各方面都比你强，你应该怎么处理与他的关系？ 设法把他调到别的部门。

40、你希望你的上级应当是个怎么样的人？

大方的人。 来源：PrintHR

1 briefly introduce yourself.

The resume has, to write a very detailed.

2 why are you interested in this job?

To tell you the truth, I was not interested, but people can not find a job, to do.

3 talk about your strengths?

You mean like other candidates compared? I don't know them.

4 what is your biggest weakness?

Too honest, leading to say I do.

5 why do you feel you are right for this position?

Your advertisement only one position.

6 your resume what deserves special attention?

The cover is more beautiful, spent two yuan of money to do.

7 Why do you choose this major?

Blind choice, do not know what love was.

8 what are your hobbies?

Spare time likes when exposed.

9 you for the short and long term goals?

Short term goal is to survive, the long-term goal is not to know, life was like a box of chocolates. 10 if I were to ask your friends or family members to ask of you, how do you think they will say? I think you smart you should ask my enemy, so the answer more reference value.

12 what motivates you to succeed?

Success will have the money, money is a woman

15 can you give me an example of teamwork and leadership examples?

I in university like gambling, each time playing cards are my organization.

16 you have experienced what is the biggest challenge? And how did you overcome it?

In the University of gambling is caught, the school wants to fire me, then I give the director bought 6

17 Why should I from so many candidates to choose you?

You want me to answer the question why.

18 do you have any questions?

If there is no easy work overtime?

19 of your income last year is a number? What are your compensation expectations?

Last year I played one year, no income. I on the expectation of reward is: what you can do to the more the better.

20 in the past days, you feel what is the greatest achievement?

In this world live more than 20 years is not dead.

21 have you ever been asked to do something unethical? If yes, how did you handle it? Not every time to go, I have my own principles.

22 If you totally disagree with a request made by your manager, how do you deal with? Agree.

26 how do you in a pile of fundamental do not finish the task to distinguish the order of priority? Anyway, do not finish, to distinguish what is the use?

27 why is a manhole cover round?

If you want to ask why is a square is a square. No matter what it had to have a shape.

30 factors which may cause you to lose power or confidence?

Bonus less than others.

31 for you, working with a team and working alone as higher efficiency?

It depends on what live. If it is of course good tug of war team, if mm foam or alone high efficiency.

32 to you is a positive attitude?

I don't care what attitude, I value the results.

33 what is your definition of success?

You know people admire you, this is the successful.

34 your university what is your greatest regret?

Money is not enough.

35 you have done what was the most difficult decision?

Others about me to be immoral, I consider whether to go.

36 what is your ideal job?

I said can you help me?

38 you leave the original company is mainly due to what?

The female boss sexually harasses me.

39, you go to a new company, if your subordinates are all better than you, you should be how to deal with the relationship with him?

Managed to have him transferred to another department.

40, you want your supervisor should be a man?

The generous man.