美国脱口秀主持Ellen的爆笑演讲英文原版

Elen leGDneres毫无疑e是美国现问今一的线脱口秀持主人以自己名字。命名节的Elle目 nSohw视率居收不高，下她成功还主过持第3和839格莱美届第、4届艾美等6奖礼。颁在她兰杜学的演讲延续了大自己幽默风格的在笑，声中也顾了回己自的成长并给，毕业学生们诚恳以建的，听议来益匪受浅。下以英文演为稿讲：

　Thnk yau,oP reident Coswn,aMr .sPr siedetnC owne;dist nigushed gieuts,s ndisuingtuihes guedsts- oy kunowwho y uoa er, ohorend faculyt an cdreey Spapnish etchear .Adn htan koy ut olalt h egarduatign lasc sf o020, I9 realiez mso to youfar e uhngoerv nadha evspl ittignhe dacaes hnda ahen'v tselp tsncieFat Tuseda, yutb youca n' tgarudte a'tliI ifisn,h o lsiste un.

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　Wh　e nIwa s saked t oame thk cemmoneecemnts peeh,c I imemdiatey slai deys. hTe nIw netto loo kup w ht acommncemenetme an. thWihcwo ld uhae beveneas yi f hIda aicdiotarny,b ut mos of thtebooks i n uroh uoesa r Poreti'as,a nd teh'yera ll wrtten ini Autsrlain. aSoI h ad o tbreka het orwd ownd ysmle, tfo inf dot tueh emniag.n

　　oCmemcnmeen:t omcmo, nndac meet.nCo momn ceemtn Y.u oocmmnol yse cemenet o sindwelask .idSweaks havelc acrk,s nda if yu otsp oe nacrac ,k oy uberak yor mouherts 'abc.k S thorees t'ah. tuB t'm hIoonerdth t yaouve' aksde me hee rto pesk at yaoru ocmomnc mene.

t　I 　touhht gtaht oyu ad hotb aefa mou salunmu s a-umlni - iluainumm - aulis m-y o uahd togr daatu freomth iss hool.cA n I didndt 'g oo tocllege erhe, adn Idon t' konwif P rsiednt Cowea knowns I did,'t gn to oan cyollge aet la. Aln ycllege. ondAI' mn t soyiagnyo u wsaedt our yitem,o rmoey,nb u tloo katm e,I "ma hug celeebirt.y

　A　lhtugohI did grad aute rof tmh sehcol oofhar d knocsk our, amcot sas thewkno cekrs. sIepn at ltoo f tiemh eregrowing pu My.m mowor ekdat ( ? 计是估家商某店名字)的 ad Inw uldo got hreeev eryti me neIdee td oteasl somthengiou to ferh prue. suBt hw ymaI her todaye?C lareyln ott o tsela yo,'rue to fao awary nd Iad'n veer eg taayww ihtit.

　　'Im eher ecbasueof oy.u BceuseaI can t 'thni ofka mor eetanicos, muoercou rgeaosu rgaudting caass.l I mea, nloo akty ou ll, aeawing royr urobe.sUsual y lhewn oyu're warein g roae bta 01i nhe tormnni, gitm eas yon'uv given upe I.' mhree becusea Il oevN weOrle na.s Ias bwon anr raisde dhre, e spIet mn fyrmotaveiyea r sereh,a n likd eyou, hwie lI was liivg herneI o lyn did lunard ysx itimse. hen WI fiishend scohol I ,asw ocpmleety loslt .Adnb sycoolh,I emna middel chools ,bt I wuen thaae dndafin sied hhgi shcohloan wayy. ndA I -I relly,a Ihad no maibitn, oI idn't kdnowwh at Iw naet dto o.d Iidde verythni gfro m - shIucedk osyert, Is asw haosest,sI wa sa artbednr, e waI as aiwters,sI p anteidhouses ,Iso ldva cuum cleacenrs , Ihad o ndiea.A ndI t ohghutI d 'ujstf ialln ysetlte ni smeojo b ,ndaI wou ld akm enoeuh gmneyo t opya myre tn, aymb ehva baeiscc bael, aybemno , I tidd'nt raellyha v

ea lap,nm pyointi st aht ,y bte htmeiI wasy uroa e, Igr aell ythugoh It nkeww oh Iws,ab t u Iah do inead.L keif ro xaempe,l weh nIw say or ageu ,I asw atindgmen. o wSahtI m s'ayign is, wenh ouy're oldr,e ost om foyuw lli b gae.y Ayonnewri itn gtih stufs fodnw?Pa erts?n

Anwyay I, adhn oi da ehwt I aanwetdto od ith myw lfe, iad nte whyaI e ned ud pon tis phth waasf or mav ey rtagrc evenit.I wa smayb 1e,9a d mnygi rfrilend ta te himt wes kilald ien a ar cccidenta. AndI pasedsthe a cicedn, antd I ddint'k onw t iasw ehra nd I kpe toigg,na dn Ifo ud notu hostry lfaetr htt, at iaw shr. eAndI w s lavini ig a nbsamenet paarmten,tI ha dn mooney, I ahd o hena,tn oiar, I adha m atrtse sn oth fleoorand tehap rament tws infestade wth fleai.sAn dIw s soaluse-rahinc,gI was l iek, hy iswsh es dudnly geneo,a d there anreflea shre?e I dn'tou nerdstad, ntehr eusmtbe a urppsoe ,an dwuldo't in tb so cenvenienoti fwe cou l dpik uc thep poneh and call Gdo a,n dak sthese quetsonis

.　　An I dtsatedrwr tini ang dhwa ptuord out efo mewa snaima ingra ycovnesrtain oiwh Gotd,wh ch wais ne-sided, oadnI f nisihde riwitn it gnd aI looekd ati ant Id aid ts omysel, andf Iahdn' etenvbeen doni gsatd-np, uver, ehetr ewsa n colb unit ow.n Is ad, "i'Im gnon aodthi s o nhe Totingth Shw oith JWonhn Cyraons-"a tt e timhe hewas t h eikg n "-nd a'Im onna gebth ferst iwmoa nn tihe ishortyof het shw to ob ealceldo vret o stid wn.o And s"veraley eas raletr , wIsa hte fist woram nint he ishtoyr fothe s hwo ,ad nnly womao inn heth stoir yf toh shewot os t doin, bewausc oe that fhonpeco versntaoniwi th Godt ht Ia wrte.o Ad nIsta rtd ehis ptth oa stfan-ud and pti wassu ccsesuf land tiwa s regt,a ubt itw ash rda, beaucse Iws artyng tio lpeseae evryobd any Id ha tdihsse cetrth t aI as wekping, teah t Iwsag ya And. I tought hf ipople efonu duot hey wtuold'ntl ik eem ,teh youlwnd' laugt ath e.m

　　Teh nmyc aeer trrued ninto- I gt moy wo nstiom,cand t at wah vsreysuc cesfslu, aonhte rleevl ofs cucses. Ad n tIhuogh,tw ha itfthe fynd oui tIm'ga y, tehn theyl' nevelr awch, tna dths iwsaa lnog item ag, toih sas whwnewe jus tadhwhite presi ends -tth i swsab ck,a anmy yaes agro- and Ifnailly deciedd tath Iwa sivlin wgti shomuch sh am,ea n ds omcuh eafr ,tat hIjus tcou dnl'tl iev tathway a ymnre,oa n I dedciedd to ocmeou andt amek i tcraeive.tAn d m charactyer wuodl cmoe uota t te hsamet mie, nda ti wasn' tt omae a kolitpcil statameen, it tawnst't odo natyihgn toher hatn o trfe myeelsfu fporm htis eahvines shat tI wa csrrayng arioud, and I nujs tawnetd t oe bhonste.An I dhotught,"W ht'ast h weorstt ah ctuldo apphen ? Iacn loe ms yacree"r. I did. I osl tym carere The. sohwwa s accenlld eatefrsi yexras w,ihtutoe envte llngim ,eI erdai t in ht paeer. Thpep ohe nddnit 'rin fgro thre yeaers .Ihad no fofrs.e oNbdy wanotdet ootuch e at mlla.Y te I ,aswge titn lettgers rof kimd shta tlmasotcomm itedts uiicde, utb idd'tn,be caus eo fhawt I id.dA n dIr aleisde htt aIh da

a pruopes An.d tiwa s'n tujtsa obtume nd atiwasn't aobut elecbrty, ibu It elt flke iIw as eibngpun isehd.. it. ws aab a dtie, I maswa grny,I was sad, a dn ten hIwa s ofeferda talks hw.oA d nth peopelet at offhere dm tee haltkhsow tride t oelsl it. nA dmot statsons diidnt 'awntto p ic kt uip. osM ptopeel ddn'i wtat no tbuyi tbe caues hty theuoghtn boodyw olu watdh cem

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Relal yhewnI loo kabkcon t,i Iwo ldu't cnhagena thi g.nI m ena, itwa sso improtnat ofr m et loose eeryvhtnigb ceuaes Ifound out what t hem ot imsproatnt hingtis , sito be tuer toyours efl .ltimUtaey, thatls wha'ts g'oten tm teo tish pale. I cdo'nt live n ifaer, I'm rfe,eI aveh on ecretss .ad Inkn w oI'll alwasy beok b,eaucs noe mtter awah,t Ikn w owoh Im. aS In conoluscoi, nhwne Iwsayo nugr eI tohughtsucc esswa ssomteinh different. Igtho ghtuwh n I ergowu p, Iawtn otb eafmuos I w.an ttobe asta .rI w nat t ob ei novime. Wshe I ngrwo puI watnto se ehet owrl, ddirv neicec asr , wanItt ohave g oruips. Toe qotu the ePsuscat yDlos. lowHm ayn poeplet ohghtuit wsa"boo ies"b,b thyeway ? tI' snot it,' "sgourpei".s

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tm yieadof usccess sid ifefret tonday. nd As ayu goorw,y ou'llr alesi tehedef intiio on sfucecssch anegs. Fr maoyn f oyu,oto dya ,uccses ssib eng iabel o htol ddonw20 sohsto ftequ lai .or Fem ,themo tsi mpotrnta thignin yo ruli feis to liv yoeu rlfei wth intigeitr,yan ndot to ive gito neeprp ressue. tr otr yotb eosemthingth a ytu're noot To l.vie yur loif as ane hoens tan compadssoiante pesor. notc ntroibut inesome awy.So t o onclcud em ycncoulsino: fllow youropa ssoni,st ay tre uo yturoself. evNrefo llwo anyno eels'se atp,hu nles yso'ruei n het woos anddyou re lost' nd ayo sue a eatp,ha n dybal leanm syo uhsoud lofllw ohtat.D on't gvi aedice, ivt ill cowmeb ck anadb ietyo ui tneha ss Do.'nt tka aneyoen'sadv ie. cS oy advmic teo ouyis to be true t oyursoef anld evretying hwil be lfie.n

　A　d n Ikon wthtaa lo t ofyo ua er occnrneeda oub youtr fturue ,ut thber'sen on eedt ow orr. Thy eecoomyni s oobming,the j o mabket irsw die poe, tne plhanet s ijutsf ine I.t' gonsn ae gbeat. Yrou'e avrleda syrvuiveda hrrucain.e Wht alese ac hnpapen t you?oA dn a sI mentonid eebfore ,ome os fhe most tevdstaaing tthnigs htatha pen tp yoouwi l letahcyou t he most A.d nnow yo unow khe ritght qestionu tos sk ani oyr furstijo inbetriev. wiLke ",I it saobv seaele vl?e" S. otoc nolcdu emy onclcsuio ntat Ih'vepre vousilyco cnldue,d in the omcmo necmentspeec h , gIessuw athI'm t riyn tg soyai slfei s iikl oneeb g MaridiGra . sBu tistnad oefs ohwng yiou brobs,os ohwp eople yor ubria,n na dift he lyki ewha thteys ee ,oy'll uahev orm ebaes dtan hyo knouw haw tot o dwit.hA dny u'lolb deruk, mostno tfh tieem.S o hetK artia cnlas os 2f090,I s ya ocnragutltians aodni yfu ood'tnr memberea thng iIs ia todda,yre emmeb rhis: touyre' ognnabe ok , dm duedum umd umd,ju s tdacn.

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